I had a mother say to me once, “This is her wedding but it’s my party. I am paying for it,” and I just had to sit there and smile.

In my experience, I have encountered several scenarios:
1. The bride and mother are completely in sync with their design tastes. (This is a very beautiful thing.)
2. The bride and mother have completely different design sensibilities, however the mother is invested in giving her daughter what she wants. (Also great.)
3. The mother wants it her way regardless of what her daughter wants.

Whenever a bride and her mother do not agree on design, it turns into a challenging yet exciting job. In some ways, I end up getting to play both therapist and mediator.

Here are a few strategies I have used with good results:

• Compromise. For example, I suggest that I’ll design the ceremony exactly as the bride wants it, then design the reception for the mother’s taste.
• Figure out ways to meld design opposites. If the bride likes contemporary and the mother likes traditional, I try to create a contemporary space with traditional touches. This balance needs to be handled extremely carefully to make them both happy.
• If all else fails, try very carefully to introduce a third option for the design that neither of them considered. (This is tricky, but sometimes it works!)

Aside from having this dynamic with brides and mothers, I find it even more difficult working with charitable benefits committees. I really appreciate these wonderful groups of people who generally want to help others in need, but at times I think they are out to drive us designers crazy, ha ha… (We’ll talk more about this on Thursday’s Common Mistakes: Not choosing the right charity to work with.)

I am mostly in awe of the mother/daughter relationships I see. I witness lots of bonding, camaraderie, fun, disagreements and love. What I find really scary, though, is when both families (the bride’s and the groom’s) do not like each other–then I just want to hide.

What do you do when the bride and her mom do not see eye to eye on design? Also when you got married (if you are married), how was the experience with your mom or mother-in-law?

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What I really wanted to call this post was: My name is Preston Bailey and I am a shoe junkie–but I figured you’d want to know more about getting the big bucks, right?

Confession time: I am capable of being incredibly superficial. Nothing gives me more pleasure than walking into Prada and dropping $1500 on a pair of shoes. (Long ago, this is what my father made in a year).

As I prance down the avenue like a very proud fashion peacock, I feel like a better person when someone acknowledges my new overpriced Prada purchase. (I am sure I am not alone–you know who you are.) However, I still have the first pair of Prada shoes I purchased 12 years ago. I can safely say that as overpriced we might think Prada is, the quality of the shoes is excellent and I always feel a bit more special wearing their brand.

This week, I’d like us to work diligently in improving the quality and perception of our business to ensure that our clients feel special and proud of using our services. In other words, work on becoming a high end business. The question is: How can you make yourself and your services so unique that you can charge the big bucks like Prada?

To Do this week (and remember, this is just an exercise to test if you are ready):

• Start by doubling the price of your services or designs.
• Choose one about how you feel: A. My customer will never pay this amount; B. I am not worth that much, I feel like I am robbing my clients; C. I deserve this and I can make this happen by giving a very unique design mixed with great service.

If you chose:
A. You are one-hundred percent right. They never will if you actually feel this way.
B. Again, you are right. It’s up to you if you think you are not worthy.
C. I can assure you (based on experience) that with time and determination you CAN make this happen. I am convinced that anything we want the Universe or God conspires with us (and the world) to help us achieve it.

Making this decision is only the beginning. Tomorrow in Frequently Asked Questions, I’ll answer the question: How did you become a high end business? I’ll also give you a few tips on how to make this happen.

Which did you choose? A, B, or C? Please share at least one example about how you managed to improve the quality of your services. And actually, I wonder: Are you interested in becoming a high end brand and getting the “big bucks” or are you just happy where you are? (A lot of artists are completely content with where they are, and of course that’s okay too.)

This is a tricky one. I am very old school and follow the saying that my clients are always right.

I constantly remind my folks this simple truth: If you do not have a client, you do not have a business. Saying no to a client is probably one of the most difficulty things to maneuver.

These are the only times I’d ever consider saying, “No way” to any client:

• Unreasonable requests. This mostly has to do with money. I had a client that actually wanted me to give her a 50% discount. My response (with lots of love) was: HELL NO.
• Unreasonable demands. I had a client that sent me emails at midnight and expected an immediate response. Granted, at times I do sleep with my computer next to me, however I try to answer my emails first thing in the morning. (Except in life or death situations.)
• Unreasonable expectations. I try to be extremely clear with my clients about what they are getting on the day of their event. I have had clients say (as if I was some kind of magician and could actually make this happen) on the day of their event, “Preston I need at least three times more flowers than that” (mind you, we are known for our generous floral arrangements).

I am all about going the extra mile for good service, but at times I simply have to say, “No way, can’t do.” Please tell me, when do you say, “No way”? And do you always say it “with love”?

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Ever since I got back from a week in California (for a wedding in Carmel that I was doing), it has been busy busy busy all over the office. We’re working on multiple projects (one being the fantastic event in Central Park last night for the Wildlife Conservation Society), which got me wondering about what you’re up to.

Please tell me, if you can, what major events or projects are you working on this weekend? And, what is your favorite part of this event or project?

With so many marketing plans and a plethora of information on business, we tend to forget the most basic fact: Your clients need to understand at a glance what you are selling and how much it costs. A confused client is most likely going to keep shopping. I have made the mistake of trying to explain what I do to clients without the proper back-up information and lost clients.

Here are some tips on how to keep it simple:

• Describe yourself and what you are about in one sentence. Be careful with using superlatives (I am the best, the most creative, etc.). This is what you show them, not tell them.
• Visuals are a very powerful tool in discussing pricing. Provide images next to your costs and always remember to have at least three choices. (It’s human nature to go with the cheapest, so make sure you are making a good profit.)
• If you are providing a service only, this is always trickier, write down what you provide in no more than three paragraphs. (Like myself, most clients get bored reading the small print.)
• Your business should have a very clear vision statement. (This can change yearly as you grow and expand.) For example, when I first started, mine was: We provide opulent florals. When my business grew into events it became: We create dramatic transformations.

Clarity and simplicity are definitely your best selling tools. I am so excited in what we do that I often make the mistake of over-explaining my services, leaving the client with the feeling that I am selling too hard (putting me at a great disadvantage). So, please remember: always keep it simple.

What is your business’ vision statement? And how do you describe yourself to a client?