I want to be candid with all of you: this was a challenging post to write. That said, one of the things Preston and I always try and do here is to be true to who we are –mistakes, vulnerabilities et all, because what’s the point of sharing a space and a moment with all of you if we aren’t going to be authentic?
Today, I had an a-ha moment and truly grasped the concept of the movement of time; it really does go by fast. We say this often, but we don’t really understand it or feel it until we come upon a milestone in our lives. As a working mother, I am the first to admit that I struggle with a number of things: my schedule, my career goals, the needs of my family… In fact, I struggle with these things more than I would like to admit which can sometimes do a number on the ego. Like so many mothers and fathers out there, I often find it difficult to balance those needs often giving the majority of priority to one area at a time.
As much as I’d love to say that I’m the perfect mommy (who doesn’t want to be?), I’m far from it. I’m adapting to the fact that my three children are in different stages and those stages come with their set of challenges and rewards. As of late, I’ve asked myself many times: What is the goal of parenting? I realize that most of us strive to raise happy children who are able to become responsible adults and then we let go…
That said, suddenly my oldest is ready to start a new chapter in his life (I’m kind of crushed). He’s getting ready to move out, start college and embrace new things. This is precisely the moment when the plethora of questions pop in to my head. Where in the world did time go? Was I there enough for him? Did I teach him everything needed during those formative years? Will he be ok without me? Am I prepared for this (notice I didn’t question if he was)?
Frankly, “we let go” the moment we give birth… But then, during our caregiving years, we become attached again just as if they were still in our wombs. We protect them, coddle them, and at times shelter them from the realities of the world. It’s not easy letting go but when you are ready to do so, realize that this is what you have been preparing them for all along.
Thinking about this made me really consider how I spend my time and also about the clients we work with. The events we do are the memories they hold closest to their hearts in their own “where did the time go?” moments. My son’s advancement served as a bittersweet trifecta lesson for me: I must accept that I can only do my best, that I must give my best to the moment I am in while there, and that we are all doing the best we can.
With a happy heart,
Kathy Romero is the Director of Event Planning for Preston Bailey Designs. She shares her thoughts and advice on Preston’s Blog every Thursday.
(Photo Courtesy of Gina Zeidler)