PB Brides: My Daughter-In-Law Is Ageist and Controlling!



Dear Preston:

I am a fashion-loving mother-of-the groom who has always taken good care of  myself and believed a woman should be able to dress anyway she’d like and do whatever she damn well felt like doing. To say I am a supporter of other women would be an understatement. You would think a bride would be happy to have avoided a monster-in-law for a mother-in-law, but no one speaks about it when it is in reverse. My son is marrying a very controlling woman and I think that’s great if that’s what makes him happy. But now she’s trying to control me! I have been given a list of “things to consider” by my darling DIL. What are these things? Oh, I am not permitted (permitted!) to wear white (obviously) or cream. She doesn’t like light blue and she knows I “enjoy wearing styles often sported by younger women” (she made a snide remark about my wearing a “trendy” Victoria Beckham dress and 4-inch heels at my office luncheon) but she’d “appreciate it” if I kept my outfit “age appropriate.”  I want to make it clear that I am not walking around in mini skirts or attempting to look like a young pop star, but I do have my clothing tailored and I will absolutely rock a high heel for as long as my hips and feet allow it. She is just very, very conservative and I am tasteful and respectful but hardly going to dress like the Golden Girl she seems to think women “my age” (72) should be.

I want to call her and give her a piece of my mind, but this is my son’s wedding. I thought you might have some advice for me.

Bullied Mama

Dear Bullied:

Normally, I would give some advice to talk this out with her and work through this over lunch, but the truth is she’s clearly out of her mind. If she saw what I wore “at my age” she’d exile us both! My advice is to continue being who you are and own your space. Wear what you want to wear. Hopefully it will look fantastic and come in light blue.



Readers: What would you do in this situation? Do you feel MIL’s get a bad rap?