I can’t believe I am writing you about this, but I have no other alternative. I need advice from someone who can see my situation objectively. One year ago, I met a man and fell madly in love. Six months later, he proposed and I was over-the-moon. We had to place our wedding planning on hold due to some personal issues (unrelated to us as a couple) but one morning three months ago, we decided we could not wait anymore and decided to apply for a marriage license. We were so giddy! We married the following Friday at City Hall and celebrated with a weekend getaway, but decided to keep it “our secret” before our planned wedding out of the country. Well, since that day, we have found that this is definitely not what we want for the rest of our lives. We are not the right fit and that’s pretty much the only thing we can agree on. The issue I have is regarding the four carat diamond ring he gave me. He says I need to give it back (it belonged to his grandmother), but I say that, since we are married, I should keep it. I was serious when I accepted his proposal and married him and he gave it to me with love and the intention of me having it forever. Now, he’s threatening to take me to court. He can’t just decide to take it back or else all divorced women would have to give back their rings. What is your advice?
I am so sorry this has happened; it’s never pleasant to hear that a marriage is ending. I can sense the frantic energy in your letter and I could be wrong, but I am guessing it has a lot more to do with the ring. That said, I will share my thoughts on who should have the diamond.
I am not a lawyer and you could go and hire one and defend yourself in a court of law, battle it out, and you might win, but my question is this; is it right?
You and this man met a year ago and it sounds like a beautiful whirlwind romance that unfolded after what seems like an impulsive decision to “make it legal”. Soon after, you both realized that it was a mistake. Is it fair to keep this man’s family heirloom because there is a marriage license ? I am not sure it is. If you were married more than a few months, you might have more of my sympathy, but I feel as though you’ll not only do this man a favor by handing the ring over, but yourself. Karma will smile brightly at your good heart.
I will close by wishing you both so much love and happiness in your lives. Do the right thing and give it back.
Readers: What do you think? Should she keep or return the ring?