Dear Preston: My Planner’s Assistant Is A Little “Green”. Should I Say Something?


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Dear Preston:

I am a bride with a question about protocol. I hired a lovely, seasoned planner and she has a new assistant who is right out of school. She’s polite and dresses well and seems to know the basics, but clearly needs a bit of polishing. While she hasn’t made any real mistakes, she is very, very green in the way she interacts with me. I feel like I should tell the planner that she comes off a little young in some of our meetings. She’s in her early twenties and seems very eager, but I sense that she has a lot to learn and it makes me a little nervous having her interact with my guests.

What do you suggest?

Just want to help


Dear JWTH:

I loved getting your email because it seems like such an important issue to address. I want to first say that I sense your intentions are good and I understand that you want your guests to have the best possible experience through the entire planning and execution of your wedding.

Here are my thoughts:

We all started out “young” either in age or experience. I started in this business a desperate man at thirty thanks to someone believing in me. Though I had no idea what I was doing, I was so eager to learn and become better, much like every single person reading this blog. If your planner is someone you respect and this young assistant has not caused any service issues, I don’t see the problem with allowing her to be a part of the process. Allow your planner to guide someone she clearly sees potential while serving as the face to troubleshoot and oversee the process to ensure a seamless and unforgettable event (in a good way). 

In closing, I want to encourage you to set the tone with this ambitious young woman. She is likely very excited to be working on your wedding and wanting to impress you and may even be a little intimidated. I say forgive the light awkwardness of inexperience and show her how to be gracious, kind, clear, professional and welcoming by example.

Readers: What do you think? Do you worry about working with young planners?