Dear Preston: Did I Do the Right Thing?
March 27, 2012
I just turned down a job for the first time ever. And it was a job I was really excited about. Not only did the bride and I hit it off, but she also had money to spend. It was a great opportunity, too, as she wanted me to do it all — the management, planning and design of her wedding.
I run a very transparent company, and, so in a very professional manner, I gave the bride a list of all the proposed vendors and their quotes. The bride then went behind my back and tried to negotiate a lower price from each of the vendors. When they asked if this was the same job I’d brought to them, she lied and said it wasn’t.
I felt betrayed. The bride obviously didn’t trust me, and if she didn’t trust me, I didn’t want to do her wedding. But did I do the right thing, Preston? Or should I have tried to stick it out and keep her as a client?
I greatly admire that you stuck to your principles. If a client does not trust you, you won’t be able to do your job. I never understand clients who think that vendors don’t communicate amongst themselves. Did she honestly think you wouldn’t find out what she had done?! That’s just plain stupid.
Obviously, this bride has trust issues. Maybe she has been burned before. Maybe, despite your clear attempts to be transparent, she was worried she were charging her commissions. But regardless of her motivations, going behind your back and lying about her enquiries was wrong.
It took courage and integrity to turn down this lucrative job. Good for you. I have no doubt that moving forward you will encounter many more clients who do understand the value and importance of trust.
Dear Readers, what do you think? What would you have done?